Poem: Question

Written by Margaret Muthee

Is it me you still feel?
Please tell me so I may heal.
Tears have flowed like a river,
I even had a fever!
For I thought u’d taken a flight…

Gone:
Gone away with the winds…
Winds that sway the trees.

Trees…they remind me of a past,
When I was sure our love would last.
Quick you are to accuse,
As if in a court of appeal.

You say our love to impress I dress.
Too soon you forget,
How you said you’d never regret,
Having me in your life.

You were vocal my love,
You professed your love to the world.
Still want you to be like a dove,
But on our love wild.

This way I’ll know,
That even when there’s snow,
You still are my one and true love!

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Author: Faith Oneya

Lover of the written and spoken word.

9 thoughts on “Poem: Question”

  1. I think the poet’s frustrated yet hopeful tone flashes through with some success. I am however not sure why the initial rhyming became erratic after the first verse and then abandoned completely after the third. Could it stylistically reflect the ‘hope’ ‘no hope’ rollercoster that are relationships. In some instances I feel the poet has rushed to make certain points hence leaving some trails of thought incomplete. The experience of the persona is nevertheless empathetical. :))

    1. Hey, Oluoch:) am sorry for taking forever to reply…totally agree with you on being empathetic…the persona is hopeful yet has doubt in some instances. They are not sure if the feeling is mutual..would be glad to get feedback on the thoughts you think are incomplete..I look forward to meeting you and reading your work as well:)

      1. My works are found at http://madiang.wordpress.com/ .

        I liked the beginning of your poem structurally and emotively. But the connectivity from the third stanza onwards seemed to me like you didn’t consider to link the flow in meaning or ‘actions’. Similarly, some images did not come in well to enhance the poem’s meaning. Sample the lines:

        Trees…they remind me of a past/When I was sure our love would last./Quick you are to accuse,/As if in a court of appeal.

        It is jumbled I think. And then, when you think of Appeal as the final resort to a long-running court battle, I do not think ‘quick’ would fit as a descriptive word there.

        I think you impressively capture the human experience with love’s disappointments and the cry foe a sign that partners always crave when they have, to use Faith Oneya’s short story, ‘imaginary’ boyfriends and girlfriends. The persona’s confusion and desperation is well toned within the poem.

      2. Oluoch Madiang…you are Point blank? Thanks for your critic…I really do appreciate. Also reading you…Let’s keep sharing 😀

  2. Margaret is full of untapped talent and this piece is just but a showcase of what she is capable of. Look at the feeling she gives this poem. I was taken aback by her diction and felt like she was talking to me.

    1. Hi Ricwriter,thanks for your comments on the poem.There is certainly depth in the poem and the writer manages to bring in the emotional distress…

    2. Rix..thank you! You are a great writer too and want to read more of your work this year! Also hope tp learn from you since you are still in Daystar am hoping:)

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